It was one of those weekends...February 28th historically has been a strange date. This weekend was no exception. First off all I have been waking up before the sun for weeks. Up about 5am. Not sure why that is but rather than fight it, I choose to go with it. In this solitary time when my world is still asleep, all except my cat, I have been getting a lot done. Even though I don't get to sleep in.
Sunday morning I woke and came to my desk to find the sound of metal on metal clicking. Blue light flashing in a panic! That was the confirmation that my graphics hard drive was having a melt down. I tried the power switch and a reboot several times. Sure enough it was too late and the drive is lost.
Normally I would be pulling out my hair over the situation. Much to my surprise I remained calm. This wasn't the first time a drive had died on me but this drive was within warranty. Not to mention I had my entire music library backed up on the drive- 3,890 songs collected over 5+ years...
and with it, the completed box cover art for the new Hard Friction release, HF2. Where this calm came from I do not know.
Thanks to Google, I spent the morning reading threads on the topic, making phone calls and solving my own issues
instead of panicking and bitching. In the end I will recover almost all my files and the one important file, my box cover I can recreate and it will be better than before!
Moral of the lesson, '
things break down but you don't have to'. It didn't make me happy but freaking out would have made the situation worse. In the end thanks to iTunes one time re-grant pass, I'll have all my music back soon and I'll work on an even better box cover. I feel like I had been personally tested and I passed. I hope this is a sign that in future crises I'll do even better. That I'm maturing into the guy I want to be- living a life
drama free.
Then the memories came back to me: February 28, 1999- I called this month black February because it was a dark time in my life. I was struggling with my addictions and working a job that gave me no personal satisfaction. The combination was deadly. I had a meltdown and decided it was time to change my ways for good. I cleaned up my act.
February 28th marks that anniversary when I gave up Crystal Meth forever and never looked back. Given that I dabbled in the party most of 20s this was a miracle.
I guess I really had changed! 11 years ago to the day I was a cracked out mess who showed up 15 minutes late every day to his slave desk and morbidly joked about suicide. After some soul searching, and personal growth I've transformed into the guy who can be chill in a crisis and run his own company... someone who is strong, stable, creative.
It's not a very sexy blog entry today, but its a milestone anniversary.
I love my life. I love my boyfriend, my cat, my fans, my businesses and the opportunities life affords me. And none of it would be mine if I didn't make that tough decision to change on February 28, 1999.
For those of you who are still struggling, it can be done. With determination and patience you can totally change your life. One day at a time. Have faith miracles do happen!
SC